It Ain't True, It Oughta Be
And Other Lessons from Life
by William Shewmake
Trade Paper: 6" x 9", 168pp.
ISBN: 978-1-59663-598-2, 1-59663-598-3 $12.95
Special Introductory Price $11.95
FROM THE BOOK
It's important to know your strengths and your weaknesses. My wife is extremely organized, and can be fastidious when it comes to her car. She has the oil changed every 3,000 miles and she has the little stickers on the windshield to prove it.
For me, organization is never an achievement but, at best, an aspiration. . . My car, I confess, was a low priority, because it complained the least. Late that spring, my wife was overcome by the mess in my car. She broke down and cleaned it. Then she berated me for having hit the magical 10,000-mile mark from the last oil change. She insisted that I take it in and, gleefully, imagined the disgust and disdain I would experience when dealing with the mechanic. I took the car in the next day and sure enough the mechanic had some harsh words. When I returned home that night, Donna was laying in wait.
"What'd he say?" she asked the moment I walked in the door.
"Who?" I feigned ignorance.
"You know who I mean. Did he get on you?"
"Oh, the mechanic. Not at all," I cheerfully responded with a smile.
Her suspicions were aroused. She knew me too well. "What exactly did he say?"
"He said the oil was thick as molasses, and going ten thousand miles between oil changes constitutes car abuse. . ."
That's when it struck her. "Oh my God, you didn't tell him it was my car, did you?"
"Of course not," I replied indignantly. "I would never lie. You know that."
"So what exactly did you say?" she demanded.
Making sure I was out of harms way, I innocently responded, "I simply told him I had talked with you countless times about changing the oil on a regular basis and I finally volunteered to take the car in to get the oil changed."
"He thinks it's my car, you rat!" she stammered, incredulity dripping from her voice. "You go 10,000 miles between oil changes and this guy thinks I did it! What else did he say?"
"He just said that he understood completely. Women are like that; just do the best I can."
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Will Shewmake lives in Midlothian, Virginia with his wife, Donna, and their two children, Megan and Tyler. Will is a member of the Midlothian Rotary Club and coaches youth soccer (Go Fury!). Will also proudly supports other community organizations, including Huguenot Little League and the Midlothian YMCA. Besides being a good husband and father, Will's lifelong ambitions are to eliminate world hunger, achieve peace in the Middle East, and appear on the Oprah Winfrey show, not necessarily in that order.